Eplilogue

So, I survived my dark night of the soul and lived on. But the lesson I had learned was indispensable. Maybe the common denominator in my life had been music. Could this be true? I thought back, really thought back, on the role music had played in my life. Where did this start? I hated music class when I was a kid, and now, as a therapist, I had hung my while well-being on it? It was weird I knew. And yet.........So much music kept running through my head. I was recording the soundtrack of my life and it was doing something to me, perhaps even restoring my lifeforce.

Rewind. When did I first discover the gift of music? tough to say, but I knew I had to get through the block. I wanted to get to the roots of this relationship, top explore this gift, but yet something in me resisted, why?

Upon further analysis it came down to my family. Most things come down to a peson's family. Looking back I realized my parent's were both constantly performing little songs around the house, and I had absorbed all of it.

Flashback, my parents had divorced and I was 5. I was driving with my dad and my brothers and sisters to his house, and a country song was playing. The chorus went "come on in, baby take your coat off." My dad had changed the lyrics to "baby take your clothes off." Crude? yes. Innapropriate for young kids. Check. But still it was funny. Very funny. Both of my parents were very funny and they both used music all of the time to express this.

Fast forward, age 7. My mom singing Nancy Sinatra's "These boots are made for walking." For some reason this song fucking terrified me. Perhaps because my mom had ominously threatened that if I didn't clean my room that the boots were going to come and walk all over me. I didn't like the sound of that. still.....It was effective, and it was easier to clean my room than to find out if she was telling thr truth about the boots.